Have you ever felt like crawling under a rock? Have you ever intended to just let go and allow fate to take its course? Failure is an act that fails. It is the act of not accomplishing your intended purpose. A failure is a person who loses consistently and has a lack of success. It is the inability to discharge all your debts as they come due. The question remains, “How can you deal with failure?”
People cope with failure in a variety of ways, ranging from distractions to receiving social support. However, what are the most effective strategies? To begin with, positive re-framing, acceptance and humour are the key elements to lift up your spirits and feel satisfied at the end of the day. Positive reframing, is trying to see things in a more positive way and trying to find something good in what happened. In other words, be optimistic.
Humour and laughter are my favourite coping strategies. Failure may be associated with stress. A good laugh with some positive reframing, will bring down the stress and increase communication in your workplace, classroom and home. What if you do not consider yourself to be funny? LOL! That shouldn’t be a problem. Since you cannot change your “not-funny” personality, you could just find ways to integrate humour into your day-to-day life and change your communication patterns.
Making fun of yourself is a way of humour communication as long as you do not do it excessively. Joking around in your classroom or workplace, can enhance creativity, department cohesiveness and overall performance. Laughter is one way to deal with tension in an intimidating situation where you feel that you may make consequential decisions. It will help you remain calm, content and resilient.
Life’s hard knocks are as common as life’s success rocks. When you expect the process of living to always be a smooth sail, you invite a lack of realism into your life. Did you know that failure helps you create a balance in your life? It represents an opportunity for personal growth! Also try to make peace with the fact that things wont always go your way. This will encourage your to avoid being bitter and twisted.
Importantly, remind yourself that you are good enough. Failure serves as proof of being a great fear, causing you to want to withdraw and not try again. Nobody is perfect so everyone WILL fail at some point in their lives. The actual difference between people who become successful and overcome failure and those who don’t, comes down to how they managed failing and how they viewed its impact on them.You are good enough! All you have to do is give yourself the “go ahead” and keep trying.
Remain calm! Whatever, you feel, do not lose your composure over it. Look at it this way, it will not make any difference to the outcome itself, whether your blow your top off or not. It will take far less energy and maintain your image if you choose the latter response. if you are frustrated or angry, take a breather, change these emotions to something sweeter to motivate you to start again.
DO NOT take your anger out on someone else! We all know it’s not healthy to bottle up your feelings but you cannot go around taking it out on those surrounding you either. Go for a run, walk, swim or anything to help release the rage in you. I am an interpretive artist. When I am tense, I draw, sketch or paint out everything that’s eating my soul. I am a contemporary dancer. When my emotions are overwhelming, I get up and just start throwing the darkness creeping around my heart out of me through the music playing around me or the music in my head. I also sing. I sing in different genres depending on my mood. I write and gives words of encouragement to those i see falling around me because I end up reaching out to myself in the process just like the way I’m busy tying this at this moment. It all doesn’t matter how your express yourself because the point is, I feel so free afterwards.
Take your time! Overcoming failure does not happen over night. It takes time for emotions to heal. Forget about what people think of you. Most of the time, they don’t even know the actual effort you put in trying to achieve whatever it is so WHO ARE THEY to mock you?
Moreover, many people overcome failure through religion. We have all been there, put our hearts into something which doesn’t seem to click. Whether it is in class, at work or witnessing to a friend. Sometimes we feel like we’ve failed God. Yet the Bible helps us realise that God is with us through it all. Psalm 40:2-3,” and He pulled me from a lonely pit full mud and mire. You let me stand on a rock with my feet firm and you gave me a new song. A song of praise! Many will see this and they will honour and trust you, the Lord God!”
Learn to love finding out that you’re wrong about something. It’s not failure instead enlightenment. The path to finding the right way. Trying and failing is a much better teacher of what it means to be human than never trying and succeeding.